Maybe there won't be a need to rush the ROM afterall....
My aunt says Gran's turning yellow.. Liver failure...
A few weeks more, at the most...
It's not fair. The doctor said 6 - 12 mths. How come it suddenly became 6 - 12 weeks?
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
It's really weird how I don't feel rested after a supposed long weekend. Maybe it's gotta do with the little fact that I was out practically every single day visiting relatives.
It was great catching up with everyone.. except all my aunts/uncles kept pressing Melvin and I to (at the very least) register our marraige before grandma dies.
I don't know.
While it's a good idea, partly logical even, that we can just bring forward our plans by one year so that my dear dear grandma can attend one more happy occasion..
I just.. don't know.
It's very rushed. We need to settle everything very quickly because we don't know how fast she'll deteriorate... so ideally, we have before June to ROM.
It just.. doesn't feel natural. I don't feel ready. And I don't want to feel as though I'm getting married to satisfy one of her wishes, instead of doing it because Melvin and I are ready to do so. He's not even financially secure.
Sure, by all accounts, we are kinda married. We stay together, we make plans together, we talk about how many kids we want to have etc. Yet... why does it feel like I'm about to sign my life away?
Plus, I feel totally cheated of my romantic proposal. I mean, sure he's going to 'propose'.. but he has a 2 or 3 month deadline. Take the whole sitation into view and it feels so.. like.. the proposal is like.. something.. that needs doing. There's no surprise.. no.. ROMANCE in it at all. It's like a 'lets get it over and done with. there, you kneel there, show me the ring, and I agree'.
Sides, I so totally planned on saying 'No I dont want to marry you' just to give Melvin a coronary.
Now he knows I can't say no.
Goddamnit.
So all the fun in getting married just wooshed out the window. One step at a time. Wedding dinner, maybe 2011, eh?
Irene - I need your help! how does an ROM day go?
It was great catching up with everyone.. except all my aunts/uncles kept pressing Melvin and I to (at the very least) register our marraige before grandma dies.
I don't know.
While it's a good idea, partly logical even, that we can just bring forward our plans by one year so that my dear dear grandma can attend one more happy occasion..
I just.. don't know.
It's very rushed. We need to settle everything very quickly because we don't know how fast she'll deteriorate... so ideally, we have before June to ROM.
It just.. doesn't feel natural. I don't feel ready. And I don't want to feel as though I'm getting married to satisfy one of her wishes, instead of doing it because Melvin and I are ready to do so. He's not even financially secure.
Sure, by all accounts, we are kinda married. We stay together, we make plans together, we talk about how many kids we want to have etc. Yet... why does it feel like I'm about to sign my life away?
Plus, I feel totally cheated of my romantic proposal. I mean, sure he's going to 'propose'.. but he has a 2 or 3 month deadline. Take the whole sitation into view and it feels so.. like.. the proposal is like.. something.. that needs doing. There's no surprise.. no.. ROMANCE in it at all. It's like a 'lets get it over and done with. there, you kneel there, show me the ring, and I agree'.
Sides, I so totally planned on saying 'No I dont want to marry you' just to give Melvin a coronary.
Now he knows I can't say no.
Goddamnit.
So all the fun in getting married just wooshed out the window. One step at a time. Wedding dinner, maybe 2011, eh?
Irene - I need your help! how does an ROM day go?